Filling in the unnecessary gaps

I have no idea why I seem to always have a surreal moment almost every time I go see the dentist but weird things happen so often, find myself questioning just how much I care about my teeth. I mean really. So, to first shed light to the situation. I have a lot of cavities and when I say a lot I mean probably more than most of you will ever have in your lifetime. I don’t know if it’s the week teeth or the sensitivity but every time I go in there seems to be a new one. It’s like their breeding. But that’s not the point of the story. The point of the story is that this particular dentist visit was…let’s just say, very memorable.
I always try really hard not to talk about politics in public especially with people I don’t know very well. It just leads to arguments and frustration and somebody’s going to end up yelling or crying and this hold age or gender restriction. And if you are keeping up with politics you know that there are four main potential candidates right now I’m not going to use any names because again I don’t like talking about politics with people that I don’t know but I will say in general, everyone seems to have their preference of one over the other. So here I am at the dentist trying to get some fillings put in when the lady in the chair next to me started talking about politics and who she plans on voting for to dental hygienist to which he responds with his schlep about how he’s not to going to vote for anybody because he didn’t like any choices politicians. My dentist then says how that is a shame because as an American we should all exercise our rights to vote. I kind of shrug and nod because again, I’m trying not to get into this. I just want to get the holes in my teeth fixed and leave but of course that would make it way too easy. Once talk of politics was already on the table, my dentist asked who I plan on voting for which the question that is up there in the top 5 questions I hate being asked by people I don’t know. I try to avoid the question but he was insistent. When I talk about who I might be leaning towards, this is when he goes on a little rampage. Oh wait. Did I say little rampage? I literally mean he went kind of crazy…. while I am literally hanging upside down because the filling that I’m getting are all on my top teeth. Literally blood is rushing to my head when he takes his masks off and spends the next 15 minutes ranting about all the candidate except for the one that he likes.
In all honesty this was partially my fault I’m not very into politics so I only know the basics when he asked me about certain policies that I liked. I just wanted to get out of there as quick as possible so I threw out a few of the phrases that I’d heard on CNN. Yeah if I could do that again I wouldn’t have said anything. Because that’s really what started him on his little hissy fit. I mean I know messed up. I don’t know what I was talking about and was trying to pretend like I did. But he knew that and instead of being grown-up and fixing my teeth, he started to quiz me on why I like certain policies over others when it was obvious that I didn’t know very much. Again reminding you I was hanging upside down with him holding a drill in his hand. So around the 13 minute mark and I know it was 13 because all I could do was stare at the clock across for me so I don’t have to look at them in the eyes, I really wanted to tell him very nicely “Hey would you mind just fixing my teeth because I have other things to do.” but then I remembered that this guy was literally going to drill into my mouth and did I really want to make him mad? Probably not so I listened. I listened for a very long time as he explained to me all of the things that I was saying incorrectly that I actually had an out of body experience. And then to wrap it up he definitely said the phrase “I don’t want to persuade your vote but…”
After he was done and I was getting my fillings done, he and the dental hygienist were talking about all the crazy things they did and kept asking me questions while they both had their hands in my mouth. Why dentist do this? I don’t know but then they kept pausing, looking at me like they wanted me to respond but again they both had their HANDS IN MY MOUTH. Stories about FBI, cops shootings, dying gun control all came up in this tiny span of about 20 minutes while I got my fillings done. One of the dental hygienist told me this really crazy story about him but I’m not gonna repeat for safety reasons in case he reads this one day but let’s just say that it was one that I definitely could have gone without hearing. He then asked if I believed him in which I kind of gave a yes no maybe shrug response as well as one could with TWO PAIRS OF HANDS IN MY MOUTH. So I would like to say that getting fillings was the most painful part of that appointment but I would be lying. Then on the way out, I called the receptionist by the wrong name, putting the cherry on top of this perfect Sunday.
Cue “Complicated by Avril Lavigne”
Putting the Fuse in Confused,
C
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