When I Grow Up, I Want to be an Adult

I keep making references to “being grown up” and “finally embracing being old” because now I have graduated from college and have started working. I officially consider myself an “adult”. I went to a party this weekend that had not only an engaged and a married couple, but also a pregnant couple. I just gain twenty points in the grown up score broad. But here is the thing. I still have some younger friends who keep asking me what the “real world” is like and if I like being “grown up and mature”. I honestly am never quite sure how to answer that. Because on the one hand, yes, I get up every morning, go to my 9-to-5 job and then come home and sleep. So that part is not necessarily fun … But on the other hand let me give you a list of things that have done very recently in my life:

I saw a commercial for Dumbo and actually cried. (From just the commercial)

I went to a friends house for a slumber party. Both of us got really excited when we stayed up past midnight and then fell asleep at 12:05.

I colored in a zoo animal coloring book more than one time this summer. (The kind where the recommended age was 2-4 and the crayons were about an inch thick)

I went to Harry Potter World with my family and me and my 25 year old brother were probably the most excited kids there. There were many 13 and 14 year old teens judging us from behind IPhones and emo bangs.

I watch my favorite Disney movie three times within 3 days and then was banned from watching it a 4th time. (This happened once before when I was about 3 so they knew to shut that down quickly).

At a neighborhood gathering when all of the adults were drinking their fancy cocktails and beers, even though I am over the legal drinking age, I ended up just drinking most of the lemonade at the kids table.

At once point this summer, I ran out of bread to make a sandwich so instead of going to the store, I just ate half a pint of ice cream for lunch instead.

There was one point last month where instead of doing Laundry, I just bought more underwear.

And on that note, if I wanted to wear something that isn’t clean, I just spray it with Fabreeze and wear it anyways.

On Halloween I wore a Pikachu Onesie and rode on the Merry-Go-Round with a bunch of other 20-somethings dressed as various animals. (At once point I saw a giraffe riding a giraffe in this intense Giraffception).
I tried to tie my shoes before going out once and had to try multiple times because I kept forgetting how it went midway through.
I almost bought light up shoes because I saw a little kid wearing them and remembered how cool they were. I didn’t buy any though because I came to my senses about how impractical and ridiculous they would be on me. (They also didn’t have any in my size)
So as you see, I am still not quite at that point in my life when I am completely a grown up. Even though I am an “adult”, I still don’t necessarily know what I want to do with my life, I don’t have all the answers to all the questions and I definitely still have those immature moments. But that’s okay because frankly, there are times in my life when I hope I never become an actual grown up. Even when I’m 99 years old watching my great-grandchildren playing on the play ground, I hope I’m right there next to them going down the slide yelling “WOOOOOO!” and the top of my lungs and double-dog daring them to jump off the swings with their eyes close. There are many parts of adult life that I absolutely love, like being able to drink wine, going to any R rated movie I want, having actual serious conversations about the world and being able to drink wine. But there are some things that I did as a kid that I am sure I will never give up. Like I will never stop putting extra, extra sprinkles on my ice cream and I will probably eat peanut butter directly from the jar at least 1000 more times before I die. I don’t think can ever stop watching re-runs of ABC’s old “One Saturday Morning” cartoons and I know for a fact that I will never be able to sleep without the closet doors wide open at night. So in short, yes I am an adult but no, I won’t be growing up any time soon.

Putting the Fuse in Confused,



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